Updated: Aug 18, 2020
How does the saying go? If you think you are enlightened, spend a day with your family? How about 3 months?
A few months back I had decided to re-built my life and work from scratch, following my heart's guidance. I had almost no savings, no income and a burning desire in my heart to be at the sea.
The place I would go to was our little house in Croatia where my mum spends her summers, and I had accepted her offer to support me for a while...
It is not hard to imagine how I was feeling... dependent, a failure, frustrated. I was triggered daily by my judgements and subconscious childhood wounds, just by the sheer presence of my mum.
In short: I felt stuck like never before.
Change of perspective
It took me a while to understand that I was put in this situation on purpose. I was not here to suffer, I was here to grow! The clear message from my guides was to change perspective and to step into more! I had a choice. Would I be focusing on 3D Reality, my stories and limitations, my childhood wounds, judgements of self and others? Or would I be focusing on the invitation for me to evolve, the possibility to recuperate by the sea, on the support I was being offered, the amazing opportunity to follow my soul's calling in divine timing?
In the first days it felt like work, and I was bouncing back and forth...
One day, I sat on the rocks and looked at the sea. I felt triggered, had trouble grounding and opening my heart, and I could not still my mind. I decided to just sense my feet on the rocks and feel.
I sat there for a while, when suddenly, I received access to grounding. I was drawn into Earth, all the way down, and found myself in her beautiful crystalline core. Even though at that time, I was not used to these experiences yet, and my mind was kicking in a lot, I allowed myself to just be there and go with the flow. I felt I was in Mother Earth's womb space. I felt was her limitless support, her unconditional love, her soft care. Mother Earth gave me what I was most longing for, and I opened up to receiving. When I was back on the rocks, it was as if everything else started falling away. All the struggle, the stress, the triggers, the overwhelm, the frustration, the pain. My heart opened wide, and I spent the most amazing day with my son, feeling supported, loving, joyful and in flow with life.
But the best was yet to come.
The embodiment of unconditional love
I got home, and when I saw my mother, I felt no trigger, no judgement, no fear. All I felt was unconditional love. All I could feel was compassion for what she is going through. I was the loving observer, letting her have her own path, her own experience, free of judgement about what I think that should look like.
Total freedom, love and gratitude.
I was put into this close situation with my mother again, to be taught the greatest lesson I could ever learn. She was teaching me unconditional love, free from any and all judgement, free from the stories of the past, free from entanglement.
It was my invitation to embody unconditional love and compassion. And when you embody something, it becomes your set point. Should you get off track, you can always come back and choose again.
Only when we open or hearts, when we enter the space of unconditional love, we have access to the whole picture, to the multidimensional truth of who we are and what we came here to experience.
We all have this choice, and we need to make it daily, moment by moment.
What are you choosing to focus on, love or fear?
An yes, when you are in the process of awakening, your shit is going to come up. It is going to be revealed, for you to let go of all the lower vibrational gunk like guilt, shame, fear, judgement, doubt, frustration and anger, so you can truly live from your heart.
And the world is going to open up for you. Focus on your inner work, that is where to magic is.