Stop “Yes-Butting” Yourself — And Start Saying Yes to Your Soul

“Stop yes-butting me!” she said.

I blinked at my NLP trainer, my eyes wide open. “Yes… what?”

I was 28 at the time, English not being my first language - well, there was plenty of room for misunderstanding! 😘

She answered , “Whenever there’s something you want, or when someone offers a suggestion to help you, you answer with ‘Yes, but…’

Honey, ‘yes, but’ means NO. 

It means your subconscious isn’t aligned with what your conscious mind says it wants.”

That moment stuck with me.

Almost 30 years later, I now hear the same pattern from the amazing people I work with — spiritual entrepreneurs, practitioners, and visionaries who feel a deeper calling, but find themselves holding back.

“I want to create that healing center, but it feels so overwhelming.” “I want to speak my truth and be visible, but I’m afraid of being judged.” “I want to create more space for myself, but then I’ll let down my kids or loved ones.”

Sound familiar? How are you yes-butting yourself?

We all have them — the “buts.”

And those little words hold a lot of power.

What “Yes-But” Really Means

A few days ago, I spoke to a truly gifted Reiki practitioner. Their energy work is incredible — but they weren’t sharing their gifts publicly.

So of course, I encouraged them to share their light with the world.

Their response? “Yes! I know, I would love to… but I still doubt myself.”

That’s it. That’s yes-butting.

It shows up in so many ways, basically saying:

✨ “I want to create the life I truly want, live my purpose and bring my visions to life, BUT________ (fill in the blank).

As I said, , ‘yes, but’ means no.

It’s your subconscious saying: “Stop. It feels unsafe to go this way.”

And it will keep sabotaging you — not because it’s cruel, but because it’s trying to protect you.

It doesn’t realize that the comfort zone it’s protecting is the very thing keeping you stuck.

How to Stop “Yes-Butting” Yourself

Awareness is the first step. It's hard to change what you don’t see, isn't it?

Here’s a simple yet powerful exercise to create awareness without lending your energy to what you don't want.

1. Write Down What You Truly Want — and Add a “But.”

Tune into your heart and your dreams and desires. Write down what you truly want, followed by ", but".

💎 “I want to create a thriving healing practice and leave my corporate career, but…” 💎 “I want to own my spiritual truth and share it boldly, but…” 💎 “I want to create more peace, wellbeing and creativity in my life, but…”

Use your own words — let them flow naturally.

2. Listen to Your “Buts.”

This is not about giving energy to "the negative". This is about illuminating what is already there and reclaiming your power.

Your "buts" are subtle objections from your subconscious mind. As long as you hold on to them, it’s like having one foot on the gas and one on the brake.

Write them down.Don’t judge them. Just notice the subtle voice or thoughts.

3. Be Present With What You Discover.

Simply be with what has come up - free from judgement. Some may dissolve - presence transforms. For what's left, use the next step:

4. Choose consciously.

Now tune into your heart and ask yourself:

✨ Am I ready to release the fears and stories holding me back?

✨ Who can support me in this transformation so that I can move on with grace, ease and flow?

Why This Matters

It is quite simple: 💎 If there were no “yes, but,” you’d already be doing it.

When you shift the energy behind your obcections, you move in alignment - your thoughts, emotions and actions moving in the same direction. Now synchronicity can show up, life becomes more joyful and ease drops in.

Are You Ready to Stop “Yes-Butting” and Say Yes to Your Soul?

If you’re ready to release the fears, doubts, and limitations that keep you small — and step fully into your authentic, vibrant, thriving Self — I would love to support you.

✨ I have a few spots or a free discovery session.

Together, we’ll uncover the deeper patterns, bring your subconscious into alignment, and help you create a life and business that truly reflect who you are. You can schedule your session HERE.

Sending ocean blessings of love and light, Natasa 💫🌊💖