Updated: Aug 18, 2020
How many times are you looking at your phone while your kid is asking you a question? How many times are you looking at he screen of the computer when they start telling you about the amazing discovery they have just made? How many times do you take time to be and play with your kids, and then you spend the time making pictures of them, or answering a text message or cooking /cleaning at the same time (one of my favorites!)? How many times do you engage in a conversation when in fact, in your mind, you are answering your emails or plan your next meeting?
Our kids don't need our time, they need our undivided presence!
Next time, when you are working on your laptop and they ask you a question, stop. Look into their eyes. But look with presence. Make the connection from your heart. Feel it. See them for how they are, not as your distraction from your work.
Our kids want to be seen. They want to be heard. They want to feel understood.
None of that happens when we don't have an open heart, fully present in the moment.
Before your kids start acting out in their despair of getting your attention, before they go and play by themselves for hours because you are not available, make a conscious decision to honor your own needs, and those of your children (as in fact, they are yours as well!).
Ask your children how they want to be loved. Open your heart. And stay with that. They will start talking to you in ways you would never have expected.
My son asked me two days ago to spend more time playing with him. We agreed to take 2 hours a week, and make it his time. His time and my full presence for him. No cooking, no mailing, no "just a second I need to finish this post, it is important."
What can be more important than the present moment cherished with your most loved one?